I’ve been in a bit of a funk lately. I haven’t felt like writing. I haven’t felt like taking photographs. I haven’t felt like editing photographs. I haven’t felt like blogging. I haven’t felt like reading blog posts. I haven’t felt like planning. I haven’t felt like participating in all the Facebook groups I’m in (several blogging groups, several photography groups, and one for owners of Cavalier King Charles Spaniels), and I haven’t felt like many more things that I usually do feel like! So what’s going on?
Well, I guess it’s a combination of many things. All members of the family have returned to work following the Christmas and New Year break and my sister, niece and nephew who have been visiting Brisbane since before Christmas have returned to Sydney. So, apart from the dogs for company, I am alone a lot again and at times it can feel pretty lonely. Speaking of dogs, I’ve become 24 hour carer for my elderly dog ‘Chelsea’ (you can see her here) who is due to turn 16 on 3 March (if she makes it to her birthday). Though she’s not in any pain or suffering, she appears to be declining quite rapidly. My daughter has been away overseas now for a month and I really miss her (one more month to go), and there have been several other issues I’ve had to either endure, work my way through, or sort out. I’ll spare you all the boring details except to say that the ‘issues’ include some health problems that are causing me much discomfort and havoc at the moment and sadly they prevent me from doing many of the things I would really like to be doing right now.
When I get in a funk (down, overwhelmed, stressed, lacking concentration and focus, unwell, or just out of sorts), it is time to recalibrate. Here’s what recalibrating means to me:
It’s kinda like when you’re using a GPS in the car and you decide to go a different way than what the GPS tells you or you make a wrong turn. The GPS voice will tell you it is ‘recalibrating’ (whilst probably swearing under it’s breath haha). The clever little cogs within that GPS will work out where you are right now, where you need to go, and find an alternate route. All will be ok.
So what does recalibrating look like for me? Well, let’s break it down into the three R’s!
No point beating myself up. No point in why me’s. I do my best to accept what is, let go of high expectations and negative self talk, and have faith that all will be ok given a little time and patience.
I take time to think things over. No planning – just thinking. What are my priorities? What really matters? What do I need to do to feel better? What can I do now to improve how I’m feeling? What do I need to stop doing and what do I need to do more of – either temporarily or permanently.
I go back to basics, find myself in this current place I am in, and then I work out what is needed to heal so I feel more balanced (in all respects) and well again and able to more forward as I’d like to.
I try to keep my eye on the recovery ball – with a strong focus on a healthy state of mind, body and spirit – healthy foods, drink more water, schedule in daily exercise (usually walking for me), and do things that make me feel good (reading, meet up with a friend etc). Walking at the local waterfront where I live is good for my head and my body and being out in nature does magic things to my mood and spirits. It also provides a good opportunity for thinking!
When it comes to health issues – I make the necessary medical appointments for help and guidance where needed, accept the necessary inconvenience, and go with the flow from there.
I aim to forgive myself and try not to dwell on my perceived failures and/or shortcomings. I put aside perfectionism and all the high expectations I have of myself and I try to be kind and gentle to myself, as I would to others in the same position as myself.
Once a sense of balance and wellness returns, then I’ll start to think a little deeper about how I can move forward. I will redefine how I want to spend my days, how I want to feel about myself, what I want to achieve. I’ll ask myself some questions. What do I want? How do I want my days to look? What do I want to achieve? How do I want to feel? How am I going to achieve what I want? I’ll answer these questions to myself honestly and realistically, so that what I plan is something that is truly achievable and sustainable for me.
I’ll start to set some loose goals and begin some planning. I’ll be sure to break my tasks down into small prioritised and achievable chunks so that I can feel the satisfaction of progress quite quickly. I learnt a long time ago that this works well for me and motivates me to keep going. I’ll start to set myself up so that I can feel how I want to feel and achieve what I want to achieve.
As part of my ‘regroup’ process, I have decided to take a step back from the blog and the blogosphere for a while. I’ll still post occasionally when the mood takes me but I am taking the pressure off myself with regards to blogging consistently and being a regular contributor in the blogosphere. I think this is a good thing for both you and me for now for a number of reasons. The main reason being that I don’t have the energy nor am I in the proper head space to be publishing quality positive blog posts out into the blogosphere as I’d like to. My blog is not currently how I want it to be, and I’m not surprised that it isn’t, because I am not operating at my optimum best. So, my priority right now is to look after myself and my health and return properly to the blog when I am able to function at my optimum best and shape it into the kind of blog I have a vision of it being in my mind’s eye. The plans and goals that I wrote about here still remain. There’s just going to be a bit of a delay before I can begin to put them into action.
What do you do when you’re in a funk? Do you think the three R’s would work for you?
Ciao for now,
Linking up with Essentially Jess for #IBOT